Wow! Has always been my reaction to the sexualization of
young children! From ads on TV for this type of doll to the clothes that are market
to young children. As an Early Childhood
Educator I have strived to make sure that the children I care for have a
healthy image of themselves both how they look and who they are as a
person. My children come in all sort of
sizes and shape and in both sexes here no one person is better than the next
and what they might see on TV in relation to how to behave stay on the front
porch. Girls do not have to play the
victim and boys the aggressor all the time.
And it is not OK for them to either dress in a provocative way or need
to show off muscle to gain attention from a friend.
Personally as a mother of two daughters I have fought back
against the norm for what my daughters wear and how they behave. When shopping for clothes it is hard to find
clothes that fit without being too revealing, tight or for girls that are older
than what I am shopping for, but we have found them. Also giving into girls wanting Barbie doll at
a young age, I have had girls ask for them when they are three or four. I just simple explain that their finger
muscles are not ready for dressing them at that age and I will give you one
when you are six. When parents ask me
about this I say the same thing but also add they do not need to be exposed to
wanting to be like Barbie at a young age and the unreal expectation her body
type send to them. I am happy to say by waiting and send them messages
that their body is fine the way it is none of the girls I have care for feel
that they are too fat, thin, ugly, and pretty or any other “too” you could add.
Then I have also seen the other side of girls wanting so much to please a boy
or their dad they will do anything, from wearing the skimpy clothes to walking provocatively
to them. Some of the girls doing this
without even thinking about what they are doing because of what has gone on in
the family and what the father or father figure has exposed the daughter too. Most of the time these girls have been removed
from the house and the male has been charged with molestation and it takes a
lot of working with the girls to let them see themselves as a person and not an
extension of their dad.
As I work with girls in the different parts of my life I let
them know they are in control of their body.
I tell them they are the way God planned them to be. They do not need to
act or be “sexy” to get a boy that in fact if they are true to whom they are
the boy will like them even more. So it
is fine if you like to play with trucks and want to be a firefighter that there
is a boy out there for you but it is also fine if you prefer to play with dolls
and read. There is no right way to
behave or be no matter who you are as a person.
I agree we need to spend more time telling children they are okay just the way the are and that they are just what they are intended to be. It is also okay to say "No" to our children and as you did, we should explain our reason behind the "No". We need to respect children enough to be albe to say why we feel a certain way with regard to clothing, music, TV shows and toys. They need to understand that "No" is not forever and that there is a time and place for everything they will encounter as they grow up.
ReplyDeleteI agree 100% Laury. We need to reassure young people that they are fine just the way they are. We must work with them and continue to encourage them to be their own person and not worry about what is depicted on tv, magazines, or music video on what one should look like.
ReplyDeleteHi Laury this is so true beause what children see on tv, media, and magazines think this is the way to be and it's not. I try to teach my girls that you don't have to flaunt it in order to get attention you should want positive attention like getting to know the person and that person to getting to know you for your mind, heart, and soul not your bottom. Children needto know that they are valued because of who they are and no matter what you can be whatever you want to be.
ReplyDelete